The Work of Transitions
Transitions involve understanding routines, being able to express yourself, learning to handle worries about the world, and developing cognitive skills. One important skill is called object permanence. This is the understanding that things continue to exist even when they are not in front of me. This concept more fully solidifies around 2 years old and it allows a deeper understanding that a child’s important people, places, and things do not disappear, and that we can understand and think about them when they are not right in front of us. Separation anxiety is another natural and healthy aspect of development that can impact transitions. When our important caregivers come and go from our environment, understanding that they continue to exist, where they are going, and having a small sense of when they might be back all help us cope. In addition, it’s vital to surround ourselves with other safe people who will empathize and help us manage as we work through various transitions. Keep reading to learn about supporting transitions for your child.
1-2 Year Olds
Here is some of the vocabulary 1–2-year olds are working on that can support transitions:
-The names of family members, objects, daily routines, and places in their world
-Words related to time: wait, soon, later, first/then, 1 more minute/time, all done
-Nouns and action words for daily routines
Considerations:
- Regulation
- Previous experiences
- Relationships
- Understanding what will happen
- Expressing feelings
- Control of self/situation
- Perspective taking
- Reasoning skills
- Prioritizing
Supporting Transitions for Your Child Through Language & Play
Read books about transitions
There are lots of books out there about daily routines, such as taking a bath or bedtime. Books that work through the concept of a parent going to work and coming home can also be very helpful as separation anxiety builds. Some books I have tried include: Mama Always Comes Home, Run Away Bunny, and Llama Llama Red Pajama.
Practice transitions in play & everyday routines
Playing games and role-playing transitions help build trust around what will happen and help establish early language skills. Play hello & goodbye games, pretend to leave for the store, pretend to go to sleep and wake up, or playact other daily events. When your child is along with you for a task like grocery shopping, doing dishes, or cooking, encourage them to participate. It engages them in something meaningful and memorable, while supporting the skills needed to understand what happens and when, which is essential for transitions. The next time you must leave to go grocery shopping, your child will have a stronger sense of what that means, which increases the likelihood the transition will be successful, whether they are with you or not.
Use language, visuals, and/or objects in your routines
Highlight important language, such as who will be there, what will happen, where you are going, and when it will happen to break down transitioning to someplace new. Using objects and pictures can sometimes be a nice supplement to language, particularly if your child is feeing emotional or has had a previous experience that was challenging. Transition objects are items that are comforting and provide a sense of safety (i.e. a special blanket or stuffed animal) or an object that represents a routine that is about to happen (i.e. toy car keys when you’re getting ready to get in the car). There are lots of options for picture supports. Draw or print out a small number of concrete pictures of your day and post it on your fridge to talk about, print pictures of common places you go in the car and keep them in the backseat pocket to show before you travel, take pictures on your phone of people and places and use them as a reminder when you go back. Most important, do what works supporting transitions for your child!
Practicing Transitions
Everyday Transitions
Into and out of play time, between toys at play time, mealtimes, bedtime, bath time, getting ready to leave the house, parents leave for work or errands
Less Familiar Transitions
Into and out of a store, into and out of school, going on a vacation, family members or friends visiting and leaving, doctor appt